Monday, 9 May 2016

Thoughts and feelings #1

Hello. It's me
I'm sorry that I haven't posted on here this year. In all honesty. I really lost the passion to write. I feel like maybe doing something differently might make me want to write more. So I'm just going to post rambles about my life, what i'm thinking, what i'm feeling, est. I just want to let go of all of my thoughts and feelings. People might not really enjoy these posts. But I'm really just doing them for myself. I might start doing posts like I used to make. I just need to get back into blogging again.
I feel like I standing on earth. The world is moving, people are going to work, hanging with friends, snuggling up to a significant other. I'm I'm completely alone. Standing still while the world goes by me. Everybody else has a plan. They know what they want to study, what job they want, when they will get married, when they will have kids, est est. While I have no fucking idea at all. Everyone is so sorted, and I'm just unsorted. Miscellaneous. Unimportant. A nobody. When I'm around people, I wish that I was what I feel like I am. Alone. I would rather be invisible then have to put up with people glaring at me when I enter a room, there eyes piercing into me. I guess that it would be alright if I had some friends. I haven't made any since I started collage. But to be fair, there isn't anyone that I would really get on with. I had such a good plan for collage.I would be finally doing what I enjoy, I would be away from people who knew my past, so in a way, I could re-invent myself. New friends, the lot. But like with many dreams in life, it never works out the way you Want. Didn't make new friends, I hate my course, and I'm still that unhappy person that I was in secondary school. I'm just glad that collage finishes in June. I still don't know what I want to do next year. But I could have a chance to re-invent myself again...

Saturday, 12 December 2015

A love/hate of Carrie Bradshaw

A wise fictional woman once said "The universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a hell of a sense of humor." In my honest opinion this was one of the only times that Sex and the city got so real and so smart that it fucking hurts. While we are on the subject of Carrie Bradshaw and Sex and the city in general, Carrie is a fucking smart, underrated fictional character, as well as kinda stupid. I'am of cause talking about the original Carrie, not the crappy "budget" Carrie from the short-lived "The Carrie diaries".

If anyone is unaware, Sex and the city is an american TV show, based on the book written by Candace Bushnell. The show follows the lives of 4 women, who despite all of there different natures and ever-changing sex lives, the 4 of them remain inseparable and confide in each other. The series ran from 1998 to 2004, after the series had finished 2 films were made, the first in 2008 and a sequel in 2010.

Carrie, the main character, played by Sarah Jessica Parker, writes a newspaper column (which is later adapted in a series of books) where she talks about her life, love, New York and of cause sex. In each of her columns/every episode she asks a question. In my opinion the 92 questions that Carrie poses throughout the whole series are fucking smart and thought provoking, like some of these questions have been so deep that it has made me think hard about my life and relationships that I have with people, for real. Like a lot of them are just philosophy. Philosophy of love, forgiveness, sex,  just flat out philosophy.

 Some of these genus questions are "When it comes to relationships, is it smarter to follow your heart or your head?" "In a city as cynical as New York, is it still possible to believe in love at first sight?" and, my personal favorite "No matter how far you travel or how much you run from it, can you even really escape your past?"

I know that right now I'm all like "Go Carrie", "She's so fucking smart" but. Some of the questions that she asks are flat out stupid.

  • She has been sexist more then once - "Are all men freaks?" and "Do women just want to be rescued?"
  • Some of her questions just make no sense at all -  "Are relationships the religions of the nineties?" Just WTF. 
  • When she is down, she thinks that everyone is out to get her, including younger women and married women - "Twenty-something girls: friend... or foe? "Is there a secret cold war between marrieds and singles?"
In fact, as a character she has done a lot of dick moves. Like Aidan. Oh Aidan and Carrie. I'm not even going to get started on the mess that was Carrie and Aidan's relationship. Not today anyway.

Anyway, enough of the bad stuff. Let's stick to the good.

Carrie, as a character and as a fictional person reminds me of every young naive girl living in a big
city. She wants the same things as every (stereotypical) single woman, hell maybe some single men as well. She wants a great group of friends who will support her in what she does, nice things (shown by Carrie's fashion obsession), and most importantly she want's somebody to love, someone to grow old with, someone who will put up with her, somebody who loves her. Just the way she is.

I think that on the inside, we are all just like Carrie.

- If you want more of these let me know! I might even write about the other characters in Sex and the city/characters in TV, films and games. 

Tuesday, 1 December 2015

It's been a while...

Hello. It's me. I'm just wondering if after all these mouths you'll like to meet t- tbh this isn't really working is it. I've kinda been listening to a lot of Adele recently.

Remember me? I'm Sam If you can't remember, it's really been a while.

So it's been a hot minute since I have posted anything on here. And I'm sorry. Life just got in the way. Talking of life, nothing much has changed since I have last posted anything. Tbh my life is kinda more shitty then it was then. Life hey, it sure has a sense of humor.

Here is a quick run down of what's been happening

- I have started collage and I honestly hate it, I haven't really made any friends in my course, my course is kinda shit, and my timetable kinda takes the piss. On Monday I have to be there at 9am for a hour and a half. Tuesday, 9am -9:30 then a free period til 1:15, I rather just do all of my lessons at once. Wednesday is basically the same as Tuesday but my free starts at 10:30. At least I have thursday and Friday off thought.

- I kinda met this guy, but I don't really know what's happening there. Way too complicated to explain.

- (not even my life but whatever) My best friend has been dating a guy for the past 7 weeks and he's good for her, I'm happy for them.

- I have kinda changed a lot, to cut a long story short I think that I have depression (this might be explained in another post maybe idk yet.)

And that's all that has really happened in my life since my last post. How exciting my life is.

I'm going to start posting again on here, but I'm just going to say now, that I'm not going to be posting all the time. I'm aiming on posting at least once or twice a week. I will also make some more changes, like by dropping the "Just Me" in the post title and I'm going to changing what I post, it's mainly going to be lifestyle stuff mixed in with my life. Kinda like Carrie Bradshaw.

And that's it really, sorry if this was a short post, I'm writing this on my phone.

I'm happy to be back


Wednesday, 2 September 2015

Life Update - I Start Collage Tomorrow! (Some changes being made. - Please Read!!!)

Very quick blog post

Hello everyone!

So tomorrow I will be starting collage (UK collage, not american. Basically I will be in Year 12/11th grade.) I will be study BTEC Level 2 in Creative Media Studies, and I will be re-taking my Maths GCSE, as I didn't get a C or above in Maths.

As I will be starting collage, their will be changes to how often I can post. I don't know yet how busy collage will make me, how many deadlines that I have est, est. I have only been able to post a lot since the start of this blog, as I was on a 3 mouth holiday, after I had finished school and my GCSE's.

Anyway (getting to the point) for now, I will be posting from now on a least twice a week (I will try! And if I have the time or I'm not that busy, there will be more posts then 2.)

Andddd, as I won't be posting a lot, I have decided to make the blog posts that I make a lot longer, then what they are now. Their will still be some posts that are short like Brain Dumps, for example, as they are meant to be short and week.

I will also be starting a new type of blog post, where I talk about how collage is going, how I'm handling it, advice for people who will be starting collage new year, talking about a course, est, est. Basically, A Brain Dump about collage life. This will be a weekly post

Overview of changes

  • Less blog posts per week (at least 2 blog posts, maybe more if I have time.)
  • Much longer blog posts (as I will be posting less.)
  • Some blog posts will stay short (like Brain Dumps
  • A new type of blog post where I talk collage life (weekly post)

So yeah, that's it really. It's really hard for me to make changes to this blog. Bit sad really, but you know, needs must, and "There's nothing wrong with a change!"

If you are not very keen on the new post, then it's fine! I will still be doing my normal posts that I'm making now!

Hopefully I can blog tomorrow, If I can then I will be telling you all about my first day.

Bye guys!!!!

Tuesday, 1 September 2015

Just Me - August Favorites

(I'm a day late, but whatever!)

Hello everyone!

Another mouth has come and gone! Summer is now officially over :/. This year's summer in Britain has been kinda shit, but not completely shit. At least there have been some sunny days! The start of September means that school is nigh, which is going to suck for those who are still in school. I, thankfully don't have to go back to that hellhole this year, as I'm starting collage on Thursday! (Their will be a blog post talking about to tomorrow, as well as the changes that will be made. But don't worry! I still will be posting! It just may not be as often as it is now.)

But anyway, I hope you all had a great August, and I hope that September is just as good for you! I'm now going to get to the point of this blog post and get to my August Favorites!

To see last mouth's favorites click here.

Here is my August Favorites!

1. Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

I have heard a lot of good things about Gone Girl, both the book and the movie. But to be completely honest, I was never going to bovver to read the book or see the movie, as it didn't seem like my kind of thing. One day when I was looking in a charity shop, I seen the book, for only 50p. For 50p I just though "Why Not?" I'm just going to say now, that I don't really read a lot, I just tend to give up and get bored, but not with this book. I'm slowing making my way through the book (I'm on page 72 of 463), from what I have read so far, It's very good! I'm not going to spoil it for you, but it seems very "mind-fucky" so far.

2.  Tie Dye T-shirt

So, as I will be starting collage soon, I decided to get new clothes (I really need some new clothes!!) So while walking past New Look, I seen that they had a big summer sale. I never really buy anything in New Look, but I thought that I might as well seeing as their was a sale on. And while I just looking through the sales rail of clothing, I seen this shirt. I really liked the shirt, but at first I was unsure on if I wanted to buy it, I just only £8, really good price! But I just left it and did the rest of my shopping in town. On the way back to the car, I was just like "Fuck It, I want that shirt". So I went back into New Look and brought it. I love it! My only problem now is that summer is over, and I don't think that I could "pull-off" the tie dye look in winter :( I will fucking try though, don't you worry! :)

If you are interested in this T-shirt, New Look still have some in stock for £8! But only in Small. Click here for the link!

3. Mp3Tag

This is a really random thing to put on a favorites list, but whatever.

I decided to sort out all of my music in August, do a bit of spring cleaning with it I guess, mainly because I have songs with crappy LQ cover art, as well as names that are not in all caps, which really annoys me. I had to go though all 6000 and something songs, and this program really helped so thanks Mp3Tag lol.

4. Wilko's Spotless Daily Exfoliating Wash

I had seen a friend using this product before, she said that it was really good, and worked for her spots so I though't that I would pick it up, It was only £2! I just want to say now, that I'm not like really spotty of anything, I just get the random spot pop up on my face. But anyway, this facewash is very good, and It works for me as well! Very good for £2, and they have other products in the range that I will probably pick up soon, to see if they are good like this product.

So yeah, that's all of my favorite things this mouth, I feel like I didn't really pick a lot, but oh well.

Life update thingy coming tomorrow!